prog rock – Idol Scribblings

Arpeggios the God of Progressive Rock, is also known by some as Septoctimus. His sacred animals are the Camel and the Snow Goose. His genesis story tells that he was the son of a Nature Goddess and the God of Miners. Which made him a natural miner deity. He got a bad case of arrhythmia, which he caught off the Crimson King. This left him feeling fragile and drove him close to the edge. However, this also made Arpeggios an object of worship for those that stand still and listen intently to the beat of a different drum.

The primary commandment of Arpeggios is,
“The top number of thyne key signature shalt always be a prime number.”
They tend to be somewhat elitist and try to avoid lowly common time at all costs. They believe the 4th of April to be the most unlucky day of the year, and their most sacred day is the 7th of August. Whilst they consider themselves to be a forward looking faith, in reality they are more firmly stuck in the early 1980s than the carpet of a Working Men’s Club in Wigan.

Each service is lead by a group of four or more priests working together in perfect synchronicity and harmony. (There was one occasion however, when one of the priests walked off following his own special way, and then there were three.) The services of Arpeggios are notorious for their protracted sermons, which are usually in excess of 20 minutes long in order to allow time for each priest to do a solo. The worshippers in the congregation will firmly grasp a pint of ale in their hands throughout the proceedings. This is to stop them embarrassing themselves by trying to clap along. However, at the end of the service they will put their glasses on the floor and their hands together to show their appreciation.

The priesthood all dress in sparkly robes, much like kinky wizards. Every priest carries a massive bunch of 24 keys. Not only is this a la mode, these keys are for the temple door which has 24 locks. When a vocalist rings the tubular doorbells and asks for admittance, the priest inside has to use all 24 keys before the singer can come in. (This only applies to the main entrance, in total the temple has 32 doors.) Arpeggios’ priests practice a form of sacred ritual magic. This is unnecessarily complex, and can go disastrously awry if they suffer a lapse in concentration. All the chambers where spells are cast have a large cautionary sign on the wall which reads, “Focus on Your Hocus Pocus!” The rest of the temple is adorned by sacred art, all of it airbrushed.

Like many sects, they have some rituals which appear cruel and barbarous to people from other cultures, such as the Rite of Hammond Organ Tipping, which is practised by some Arpeggionians. Once on it’s back, a poor Hammond cannot right itself. It is heartlessly left there with it’s little pedals waving helplessly in the air. Then the wretched instrument is tormented with daggers to make it scream in interesting ways. There is a more humane movement within the faith to ban this brutal custom, and the recently founded “Society of Arpeggionians for the Protection of Hammond Organs” (SAPHO) is rapidly gaining support. SAPHO advocates the use of synthetic Hammond replacements and runs the Happy Haven for Harrassed Hammonds. This sanctuary has a lovely conservatory for the organs to frolic about in. If you would like to visit the sanctuary, and maybe sponsor a Hammond Organ, you will find it located in the picturesque village of Emerson on the shores of Lake Palmer. Please, please, give all you can to help the organs.

I would like to thank James R Turner @JRTwrites and Kris Hudson-Lee @nomenloony for suggesting Arpeggios.

Idol Scribblings Volume Two
Coming out 30th November 2020

Even more deities for every eventuality with a foreword by Gary Brannan of the Technical Difficulties ( TechDiff.co.uk )
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Idol Scribblings Volume One

A collection of 52 deities, ancient and modern, for all occations from Idol Scribblings. Produced in 2019-2020.

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Hello Idollers everywhere! Today I am here to tell you about one of my other art projects. Before I start, however, a quick PSA about Idol Scribblings.

From this week onward Idol Scribblings will be posting new deities weekly. I am aiming for these to be posted on Sundays. I have now almost caught up on sharing the earlier cartoons. I have a few in reserve so I can have the odd week off if needed.

The Strangefish Project

Over the last six weeks I have been working on another project for the superb Prog Rock Band Strangefish. They are celebrating 30 years together as a band this year, and I have been a fan for about 18 of those. Even more so since Kris (my sparring partner) joined them on bass guitar last year. Their music innovative, intricate and whimsical, and is that rare and beautiful combination of both cleverly complex, yet thoroughly pleasurable. They are also one of the most entertaining bands I have ever seen live. Every show has immense energy and lots of silly shenanigans. You can find out more about them here https://strangefish.band .

This project started as a silly caricature of one of the band members, and developed into a set of six portraits to celebrate their anniversary. It was great fun unlocking each band member’s inner strange fish. They are drawn using pointillism technique, and each one took about 15 hours to produce. That is considerably longer than I can afford to take on my deity cartoons.

There are a limited number of sets of 6, 6×4 prints of these pictures for sale. They will be going on the band’s merchandise page shortly.

I hope you enjoy the pictures and also discovering the music of Strangefish. If you are in a band or other creative project, and would like to commission some artwork from the Idol Scribbler, please drop me a message via the contact page .

Dave Whittaker – Drums

The Rocktopus’ eight prehensile limbs and unnatural rhythm make them ideal Prog Rock drummers and it’s three hearts make it quite bold (or in some cases, bald). It warms up using four of it’s eight arms and uses suction cups to hold onto sticks. If the stage is perfectly level, they will squirt ink from both sides of their mouth. Although they are of a naturally cheery disposition, don’t pick a fight with a Rocktopus. They are always well armed and will give you a good vibraslapping.

Joanne Whittaker – Vocals

Found in the waters off the west coast of the UK, this species of chelonian is so famed for it’s singing performances that its other common name is, “The Turn Turtle”. It lives on a diet of tropical cocktails. When not singing they have been observed schooling large groups of young fish.

Bob – Guitars

The most mysterious of all sea creatures, the Jellybob says little but expresses much through their guitar playing. In their natural habitat they have to patiently endure constant harassment from exuberant singing cuttlefish. Although mildly venomous, the Jellybob will only sting when it fancies having a good laugh watching someone try to wee on themselves.

Paul O’Neil – Keyboards

The male Keyhorse has a very small territory, about half a square metre. This is very useful when venues are small or other musicians want more stage. They are able to use their tail to hang on to things when faced with strong ocean currents or nutty singers. They can change colour almost instantly, during courtship or after playing a bum note.

Steve Taylor – Vocals

Scuttlefish are sometimes known as the chameleons of the sea due to their ability to rapidly alter the colour and pattern of their skin or, in this particular species, the colour and pattern of their shirt!

Kris Hudson-Lee – Bass

The Kristacean is a Rock Lobster, found off the shallows of the North East coast of England. It’s can often be found playing the Sea Bass. It’s never seen a Tuna though.

Tag: prog rock

Arpeggios – God of Prog Rock

From the Idol Scribbler – The Strangefish Project

The Strangefish Project